Overall, the authors found that relationship sex was reported to be better in terms of orgasm and sexual enjoyment, and that women have orgasms more often in relationships than in the hookup context.

Sexuality is typically viewed in our society as the province of young, white, able-bodied, cisgender, thin, “beautiful” people, and if you do not fit this description, your sexuality is either ridiculed or fetishized. I think sexuality educators have a responsibility to explode that myth and represent and support people of every age, race, ability, size, etc. to own their authentic sexuality. I also think that even within sexual communities that are viewed as positive or progressive, there is policing of what the “right” way to be sexual is – are you kinky enough, are you queer enough, is your gender expression or the gender of your partner acceptable, etc. I really strive to create an affirming place for everyone to the best of my ability.

I believe that sex-positive feminism is about the belief that sex can be beautiful, it can be ugly, it can be difficult to deal with or easy to understand; some kinds of sex are widely misunderstood, and some kinds of sex are widely stereotyped; some people are really into sex, and some people aren’t; but most importantly, all kinds of sex are okay as long as they happen among consenting adults.

I believe that gender is something between your ears, not between your legs.

The only way to battle shame is with pride; we have to be proud of the choices we make and stand behind them. We have to take the power out of sexual insults like ‘whore’ and ‘slut.’ There aren’t many feminists my age who don’t remember musician Kathleen Hanna — of Bikini Kill and Le Tigre fame — scrawling SLUT across her stomach as a way to reclaim the word. We need to do the same thing, not just with the word, but with the idea. There’s nothing wrong with having sex; don’t let anyone forget that